The first time I used a business coach… I saved my marriage, spent more quality time with my kids, took the maternity leave that I wanted AND I still tripled my business in one year. At the end of the year I was amazed to discover I achieved every goal I set when I started! Most people who use coaching are not people who are broken, who’ve hit rock bottom. An NBA basketball coach doesn’t teach his players how to play basketball. He inspires them to take it to the next level. It doesn’t just focus on business, it’s about life. Coaches don’t teach you how to live, they teach you how to thrive.
Now, I get to work with successful women who want to make business work for them. Women who want to live, work, and play at a higher level. I work with women who want to be successful and still put their family first and foremost in their lives. Yes, it is possible to have your cake and eat it too (figuratively, I don’t recommend cake). This is the exact formula I used to transform my business and personal life.
1. Manage your state
Women have a stigma in our society as being emotional. First of all I want to honor all women for the capacity we have to feel emotion. That is to empathize and feel emotion to a greater depth I believe, than our counterparts. I think this ability makes us great mothers and can also make us great in our professional lives too. However, if you identify yourself by an emotional state, this is a recipe for disaster. Successful women understand that your emotional state does not define you. If it did, we would be powerless to change it. We are not powerless though. We have the ability to change our emotional state at any given moment. Check your emotions at the door, literally. Before you open the door, before your enter your business, check and make sure you are in an empowered, creative and resourceful state. Successful women choose their emotional state and choose to change it if it’s not serving them.
2. Clarity of outcome
Anyone who begins a process without knowing their desired outcome will be in the process for a very long time. You won’t know when you get there if you don’t know where you are going. You rarely get in your car without having some idea of where you are heading. Usually, you know exactly where you are going and you plug that address into a map which will guide you there. Successful women know exactly what their desired outcome is in the vehicle of life. Once you gain clarity about your outcome, it’s simply a process of creating a MAP to get there. Get crystal clear about your outcome and make sure the right person is driving (see #1).
3. Separate Personal Life and Business
I spent the first 4 years of business without a clear separation of business and home. In fact there was no separation. I toted my kids along to networking events, took them to the office with me. Then when they were at daycare, I was thinking about them and when at home I was thinking about work. I took work home with me and home with me to work. All this did was cause me to beat my head against the wall with guilt. Successful women know (and I’ve since learned), wherever you are be there 100%. Whether you are a stay at home mom or work full-time outside the home, you can be very successful as long as you are 100% where you are. (See #2 about gaining clarity)
4. If it’s not planned it’s not real
Over and over I hear the same excuses: “I don’t have time to exercise”, “How am I supposed to plan healthy meals when we are always on the go?”, “How am I supposed to balance home and family life?” I feel your frustration, I really do. We all have things we want to do, whether it’s to exercise more or spend more quality time with kids. However, the truth is we all have the same 24 hours in every day. Successful women know that you have to set your priorities and plan everything else in your life around them. If you only plan your professional priorities, you’ll find very quickly that family time suffers. If you want to train for a marathon, work on your business, build a website, or take your kids to the park, you can’t just wait for a spare moment to do it, those spare moments will get filled with cups of coffee, social media, checking emails, etc. Successful women know you must plan it or it’s not real.
Anyone can set a goal. Those who achieve goals know that you must have someone or something to keep you accountable. The more people who know about your goals, the harder it is to blow them off. If you hire someone to keep you accountable, you are more invested in the process. You don’t have to hire someone, but you do need a responsible friend, trusted colleague, or respected acquaintance to keep you on track. Ask them if you can share your goals with them and have a 15 minute phone call once every week to 10 days to keep you moving forward or go ahead and hire a coach! Successful people actively seek out and acquire accountability.
At the end of a year you can look back and marvel at all that you’ve accomplished or you can marvel that another year has gone by. What you choose to act on now will determine which. The time will pass just the same. How can this formula work for you? Leave a comment below.